Entry 1

02/28/2023 - 6:11 AM

Well, it seems I've hit a new low. I keep trying to hold myself together with the thinnest threads imaginable. Sometimes I think about taking my father's gun and shooting myself with it while he's at work. Or doing something more violent and gorey like carving my guts out even though I've never even cut myself before. I was always worried I would get in trouble if I got caught. Guess anxiety is good for something huh? You know I made this website because I couldn't sleep, it's nothing new for me but I couldn't cry myself to sleep so I thought I might as well do something since I can't really harm myself in the living room I sleep in and I just didn't feel like taking my usual shower. My father in the other room is probably still awake and I just, I hate when people hear me cry even when they know I'm upset.

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